Why not add some flair to the rockets' red glare and throw in a few wild cards this year? Here are some humble song suggestions to ponder as you wait for Red, White & Boom! to light up the sky over Columbus.
Is any music montage more predictable than the soundtrack to Independence Day fireworks? Not all of the usual suspects are awful - in fact, most of them are quite good - but the same old tunes are getting pretty tired. Why not add some flair to the rockets' red glare and throw in a few wild cards this year? Here are some humble song suggestions to ponder as you wait for Red, White & Boom! to light up the sky over Columbus.
Instead of: Lee Greenwood's "God Bless the U.S.A."
Consider using: "America, F--- Yeah!" from Team America: World Police
Why?: There's more than one way to express your love for this great nation
Instead of: Bruce Springsteen's "Born in the U.S.A."
Consider using: Metallica's "One"
Why?: Both tell of embittered, disenfranchised veterans, but Metallica's is more spectacular alongside explosions
Instead of: Europe's "The Final Countdown"
Consider using: America's "You Can Do Magic"
Why?: The rationale should be clear
Instead of: Toby Keith's "Angry American"
Consider using: Woody Guthrie's "This Land Is Your Land"
Why?: Because the Fourth of July is about pumping the positivity
Instead of: Irving Berlin's "God Bless America"
Consider using: John Ashcroft's "Let the Eagle Soar"
Why?: "This country's far too young to die/ We've still got a lot of climbin' to do"
Instead of: Ray Charles' "America the Beautiful"
Consider using: Ray Charles' "America the Beautiful"
Why?: On second thought, we wouldn't want fireworks without Ray
Instead of: Whichever pop song is ruling the charts ("Boom Boom Pow"?)
Consider using: Animal Collective's "Fireworks"
Why?: For the look of confusion on 99 percent of spectators' faces
Instead of: Neil Diamond's "America"
Consider using: Chuck Berry's "Back in the U.S.A."
Why?: There's an extreme disparity in exposure for these two tunes about landing on American shores
Instead of: John Mellencamp's "R-O-C-K in the U.S.A."
Consider using: John Mellencamp's "This Is Our Country"
Why?: Both songs are patriotic, but the Cougar's car commercial jingle is hilariously campy
Instead of: Tchaikovsky's "1812 Overture"
Consider using: Explosions in the Sky's Friday Night Lights theme, "Your Hand in Mine"
Why?: The overture is undeniably great fireworks fare, but must we rely on a Russian to commemorate America's birth? "Your Hand" is homegrown and nearly as epic
What do you think? Offer your own song suggestions below.