If T.S. Eliot - a horrible man but an important poet - measured out his grim days in coffee spoons, I suppose I sometimes watch mine accumulate on greasy plates of half-chewed chicken wings.

If T.S. Eliot - a horrible man but an important poet - measured out his grim days in coffee spoons, I suppose I sometimes watch mine accumulate on greasy plates of half-chewed chicken wings.

Yes, such can be the fate of a pay-per-chew person in Columbus whose time is spent overeating and always meeting deadlines.

Oh where, oh where did the decade go? Oh yeah, down the black hole, sink hole, rabbit hole, "whole lot of room for more" unnatural phenomenon I call my stomach. Given my mistreated expanse of midsection, you can probably see why navel-gazing stories are not necessarily my favorite kind of thing.

Still, list-making and inventory-taking are what people who write for food usually do to mark ostensibly momentous passages of time. And since the first decade of a brave new century ostensibly qualifies as momentous, here comes my arbitrary list of food movements, trends and assorted edible moments that seemed to cause a bit of a fuss in good old Columbus over the past 10 years.

Localier than thou

It's my list, so I'm going to top it with something of which I genuinely approve. Sure, the locavore movement has been championed by the food-equals-morality set, and self-righteous types use its tenets as a knee-jerk solution to all sustenance questions, but locavorism still makes sense, tastes better (well, usually) and, when at all practical, is the smart thing to do.

Raise the bar, lower the cost

Fancy (read expensive) restaurants in search of more customers in a crappy economy have chosen to offer cheffy takes on pub-grubby noshers for their bar-only/happy hour menus. Personally, I hope this trend never ends.

Big plates

Mountainous portions of restaurant entrees somehow became the norm in a nation (and city) already over-stuffed with obese people. I'd rather pay a bit less for a sensible serving than a bit more for a diabetes-inducing trough-load of feed.

Small Plates

Because we embrace contradictions, that snacky tapas thing is still fairly hot, too. And even if it's rarely done in true tapas fashion, and even if the dollar tally can rapidly pile up, it's still a really fun way to graze.

I like all of these things, but enough is enough

Caesar salad

Sliders

Calamari

Tuna (or anything) tartare

Chicken wings

Designer pizzas

Bacon

Molten chocolate cakes

Creme brulee

Let them eat cupcakes

Frankly, I'm not a fan of these revivalist icing-heavy jobbies. Obviously I'm in the minority, as lots of diners apparently want a piece of their childhood back and want to eat it too.

The hog-o-sphere

Me-too food bloggers and "rate-it" websites like Yelp and Urbanspoon have revolutionized restaurant reviewing for both the good and the bad. On the good side would be widespread dining advice for out-of-towners and people who don't eat in ethnic or high-end restaurants much.

On the bad side would be that any glutton with a laptop, a camera and access to Wikipedia can now try to pass himself off as an expert, even if he doesn't even eat out that often himself, has a scattershot and clunky writing "style" not advanced beyond high-school diarist, has professionally biased and/or suspiciously personal motivations for writing reviews and will viciously slam an establishment after only a single visit.

Should old acquaintances - and new memories - be forgot

First there was a boom in microbrews, then a spike in all things wine, now it's the cocktail revolution. Hey, I ain't complainin', I'm just sayin'... Happy New Decade!