As America moves closer to just laying out a blanket in front of the garage and selling off all its old board games, it has become clear the time for action is short as President Obama now says it's decision time on the debt ceiling.

As America moves closer to just laying out a blanket in front of the garage and selling off all its old board games, it has become clear the time for action is short as President Obama now says it's decision time on the debt ceiling.

The commander-in-chief is throwing down a deadline. Last Friday the president broke out his "I mean business" speech.

"We are obviously running out of time. So what I've said to the members of Congress is that you need, over the next 24 to 36 hours, to give me some sense of what your plan is," Obama said.

So, Republicans, you now have 24 to 36 hours to be all, "We were kind of thinking maybe we'd think about it." And if you don't, there's a strong possibility you will be asked again for, you know, some sense of what your plan is.

All right, so it was a pretty wishy-washy speech, but with the president telling them this last Friday, you've got to expect by Monday we're going to see some progress.

"No talks scheduled for today and no visible progress over the weekend," reported Bill Plante of CBS.

Hmm, maybe it's not visible because it's in the microbial world. Republicans' bacteria have been anaerobically metabolizing the debt ceiling.

Why won't Republicans negotiate in good faith? Is it because they sense in the standoff a chance to weigh down this presidency with a sputtering economy, hastening Obama's inexorable slide into one-termsmanship? Or perhaps it's something that it really isn't.

"Why has the debt limit been raised 60 times what is different about this president that should put him in a position that he should not receive the same kind of respectful treatment? Why is he different read between the lines," said Rep. Sheila Jackson Lee, D-Texas.

Because he's the first president to own a Portuguese water dog? Or because he voted against raising the debt ceiling in 2006? Nah, that can't be it.

I think the reason Republicans won't work with the president isn't because he's black. It's because they think he's crazy.

"We need jobs in America, and you're not going to get them as long as the president of the United States has this tax obsession," said Sen. Marco Rubio, R-Florida.

He is obsessed, which explains his new cologne - Taxes (on Calvin Klein because he makes over $200,000 a year).

The Republicans are reacting to Obama's debt reduction plan including revenue increases such as closing corporate loopholes and rescinding the Bush tax cuts on the rich.

Wait, they're not called "the rich" anymore. Republicans call them "job creators."

Republicans are no longer allowed to say people are rich. They can't even say the word "rich." You have to now say, "This chocolate cake is so moist and job creator."

Their favorite comic book is now not "Richie Rich" but "Job Creator-ie Job Creator."