The List: Movie reunions we’d like to see

By Columbus Alive
From the April 4, 2012 edition

More than a decade after reviving the teen sex comedy, the gang from “American Pie” is reuniting on the big screen in the cleverly titled “American Reunion.”

Unnecessary sequels — and awful straight-to-DVD spinoffs — aside, we’re kind of stoked to see the high school gang as grownups. Here are some other reunions we’d pay to see.

“The Breakfast Club”

Did the athlete, the princess, the criminal, the brain and the basket case stay friends after their detention day bonding? Did their grown-up lives reflect their high school selves? Did Anthony Michael Hall’s character ever figure out how to make a lamp? So many unanswered questions.

“Carrie”

When you’re the only survivor of a freak telekinesis accident at your senior prom, organizing for the reunion is probably pretty easy, huh? So maybe we throw in … zombies! BYO bucket of pig’s blood.

“National Lampoon’s Animal House”

Sure, there’s that epilogue that tells how everyone’s lives turned out, but do you think Sen. Bluto and the gang’s lives were over? Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor?!

“Fast Times at Ridgemont High”

I’d love this for two reasons: to see now-serious actor Sean Penn revive his indelible stoner Jeff Spicoli, and to see whether Phoebe Cates still looks great in a red bikini.

“Dazed and Confused”

Sure, life was all beer runs and smoking dope for these high schoolers, but would Randall “Pink” Floyd have been able to keep his idealism intact during the Reagan years? I smell a sellout.

“Heathers”

This is one class reunion that would mostly be made up of tributes and remembrances of fallen classmates. “I still love my dead gay son!”

“Wet Hot American Summer”

OK, so fingers crossed, there’s actually another installment of David Wain’s brilliant camp comedy in the works, though it’s unclear whether it will be a sequel or a prequel.

“Clueless”

“Beverly Hills High School reunion” already sounds like a pitch for a movie — or a reality show. We’d love to see how Cher, Dionne and the gang turned out. And Breckin Meyer could totally use the work.

“Old School”

Will Ferrell just announced “Anchorman” is coming back for another round, so why don’t we catch up with Frank the Tank while we’re at it?

“The Rules of Attraction”

Bret Easton Ellis’ terribly dark satire of sex and love at a privileged liberal arts college was awfully bleak — as was the great film adaptation. I’d have to imagine that Ellis would just put them all through more emotional suffering.