Your guide to party like it’s the End of the World

By
From the December 20, 2012 edition

Friday, as we’ve all been hearing ad nauseam, marks the end of the Mayan calendar. Does this spell our imminent destruction? Probably not. But it does justify a slew of awesome parties that basically amounts to an extra round of New Year’s Eve. Here’s a handy guide to make sure you feel fine at the end of the world as we know it.

Want to go out with your fist pumping (dance club edition)? Try:

Red Zone Reunion: End of the World Bash

Before it was The Mansion, from 1998-2001 the building at Front and Main streets was known as Red Zone, one of the most popular and influential nightclubs in Columbus history. It’s coming back for one night Friday when Columbus nightlife string-pullers Chris Corso, Mike Gallicchio and Brian Swanson (who used to own Red Zone and who helped turn Long Street and Park Street into nightlife destinations) corral a temple-load of DJs, dancers, live drummers and performance art under one roof. The DJ talent includes Get Right’s Johnny Cashola, Sweatin’ founder Scotty Niemet, Jondy, Patrick Hicks, Dustin Knell and even Gallicchio himself. The whole club will be decked out in ancient Mayan frills and furbelows, so bring your favorite hieroglyphic.

Red Zone

9 p.m. Friday, Dec. 21

303 S. Front St., Downtown

redzonereunion.com

Want to go out with your fist pumping (rock band edition)? Try:

The Slide Machine reunion

Before splintering into myriad awesome Columbus acts including Nervosas, The Compressions and Nick Tolford & Company, The Slide Machine was a prog-punk behemoth to reckon with, the thrilling headliner for Alive’s 2008 Bands to Watch (where they pulled double duty as Sinkane’s backing band) among other accomplishments. In terms of apocalypse imagery, the band’s one-off return with opener BEGGARS this Friday will be the equivalent of Godzilla stomping through town.

Carabar

10 p.m. Friday, Dec. 21

115 Parsons Ave, Olde Towne East

Want to face the end of days in light and funky fashion? Try:

The Floorwalkers End of the World Party

A humorous trailer for The Floorwalkers’ big bash shows disaster scenes from the movie “2012” and promises “It’ll be roughly this epic.” That’s likely, but the show should be anything but a disaster, and probably not all that dark either. The headliners are total pros, and they’ve lined up fellow good-vibes-emanators MojoFlo, Matt Reed & TGP and The Modern Electric to pump the Newport full of good cheer.

Newport Music Hall

7 p.m. Friday, Dec. 21

1722 N. High St., Campus

promowestlive.com

Want to skank your way to doomsday? Try:

The Skashank Redemption presents The End of the World

Kick your legs up and dust off your trombone. It’s time to go down skanking. The Skashank Redemption is throwing a party with openers The DewDroppers, The Up All Nights and Zoo Trip. It’s four flavors of live music, all geared toward getting down, and $1 from every advance ticket and 20 percent of the door goes to CD102.5 For the Kids.

Skully’s

9 p.m. Friday, Dec. 21

1151 N. High St., Short North

skullys.org

Want to experience dramatic shattering sights and sounds upon impact? Try:

Glass Axis End of the World Party

As part of its cyclical study “Start: Stop: Start,” Grandview’s 10,000-square-foot nonprofit glass art studio is hosting a smashing array of entertainment Friday. (Note: Please don’t break anything.) Besides glass-blowing demos and glass daggers for sale, garage rockers Outer Spacist and The Ferals will perform, and the Heatwave! DJs will spin. Plus, Kool-Aid will be served.

Glass Axis

8 p.m. Friday, Dec. 21

1341 Norton Ave., Grandview

glassaxis.org

Want to die having fun? Try:

Last Party On Earth: Welcome to the Funpocalypse

Given the amount of awesomeness that will be packed into Club Sandwich this Friday, a Funpocalypse seems truly probable. An end of the world costume contest, mural painting, a “Last Supper,” music from The Apes and more, plus a DJ set from Kenny Lectro means the bottoms party could be tops Friday. Bring a canned food item, either for the bomb shelter or the Mid-Ohio Foodbank depending on how Friday plays out.

Club Sandwich

7 p.m. Friday, Dec. 21

566 W. Rich St., Franklinton

clubsandwichstudios.com