If you thought gentrified, festival-sized dubstep couldn’t get any cornier, just throw some “Riverdance” violin on top and prepare to be amazed. Exhibit A: “Crystallize,” a video of Lohan-esque manic pixie dream girl Lindsey Stirling theatrically fiddling her way through the corridors of resplendent ice castles, pirouetting aplenty while flashing an awkward array of mischievous grins. It’s billed as “Skrillex meets Mozart,” which would be sick, but that implies music that hits much harder than this, without so many of the rough edges shaved off. Get the Sleigh Bells guy to produce her next record or something.
Thing is, 50 million people have watched this video, which suggests I am a turd and you will be thrilled Friday at the Newport. The Vibrant Sounds open the show.