Pop Culture: Sports Bites

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From the May 8, 2014 edition

WESTSIDE CONNECTION

Golak: Amid the Donald Sterling fiasco, the Clippers advanced to the second round of the NBA Playoffs. Sterling is a bag of garbage, but some great players and solid fans seem to be caught in the middle of all this. Are you rooting for these guys a la the Yankees post-9/11 or the Saints post-Katrina?

Sumukh: I'll be cheering for the Clippers out of respect for the players and fans in this awkward and horrible situation. But, unless Sterling's mouth is capable of physically setting fire to the city of Los Angeles, I'm not sure I could put his crazy babblings on par with those tragedies. Then again, it seems possible since Sterling appears to be as old and attractive as a dragon.

HEIST MAN

Sumukh: Heisman Trophy winner Jameis Winston stole $32 worth of crab legs from a grocery store. He received 20 hours of community service, and the offense will have no impact on his status with Florida State's football team this upcoming season. Winston eludes a serious rape charge and now ridiculously steals crab legs. What type of crime is next for this guy?

Golak: Who knows? This guy seems to have a good enough lawyer to virtually get away with anything. I hear he presented grocery store security camera footage of the lobsters all over Winston earlier in the day — essentially asking to be stolen.

RUN AROUND

Golak: Wil Myers of the Tampa Bay Rays hit an inside-the-park home run against the Yankees. Needing a combination of power, speed and usually a lucky bounce, is the legged-out homer the coolest not-often-seen feat in baseball?

Sumukh: It's definitely the coolest by an athlete, but with today's security measures, even more impressive is the streaking fan on a baseball field. Come back when you're naked and drunk, Myers.

GENUINE DRAFT

Sumukh: The NFL Draft begins Thursday night. Mock drafts are all over the place, and no crazier than for Johnny Manziel. By some, he's considered a top five pick and others think no team should touch him until the third round. How good do you think Manziel will be as a pro?

Golak: Let's just say that in three years I think his nickname will be “Johnny Broadcast Desk.”