Just what is going on with Crew SC these days?

They say you can never go home again, but the last two weeks in Crewville have called that axiom into question.

Let's get to it.

Austin makes its move

Austin City Council, you may recall, was supposed to settle this Save the Crew stuff once and for all on Aug. 9. That was when they were slated to decide who, exactly, would get to use the city-owned land at McKalla Place. Would it be for You Know Who's planned heist? Or some other private development, such as an affordable housing project?

Without McKalla Place, You Know Who's proposed move would have been dead. Unfortunately, after delaying the vote, Austin City Council voted yes on the stadium term sheet on Aug. 15, potentially paving the way for the team's move.

The Return of Justin Meram

Meram famously requested a trade in the offseason because he “could never support an owner moving the team.” But now he's back, so does that mean the Crew is saved?!

According to Crew historian Steve Sirk, Meram became only the eighth Crew SC player to return to the team after leaving. Upon Meram's re-introduction to Mapfre Stadium as a member of the Black and Gold on Saturday, Aug. 11, Crew SC announcers joked that the winger had an apple pie waiting for him on the window sill.

Meram's return wasn't quite that storybook fairytale, but he was at least greeted warmly by the Nordecke — as evidenced by their "Lion of Mesopotamia" tifo tribute — when he entered the match at the hour-mark.

Before the game, Meram is reported to have joked: “I enjoyed my six-month spell [in Orlando], but it's good to be home.”

Without Vision, the People Perish

On Aug. 6, the Save the Crew movement revealed its vision for a Downtown Crew SC stadium. The reveal confused a lot of non-Crew SC fans, some of whom turned to social media to express that they thought the team was surely leaving already and, also, no way in hell are they paying for this stadium, either. No way, sir.

Still, despite whatever minor confusion this brilliant move might have generated, the buzz created far exceeded whatever's happening in You Know Where. About the only thing You Know Who's been able to muster there are full-page ads calling him everything from a used-car salesman to a spoiled daddy's boy.

Columbus Crew and the Funky Bunch?

Speaking of “fake news,” ABC6 this week asked Mark Wahlberg, who was in town to promote his new Central Ohio car dealership (?), if he had any interest in buying the Crew. To which he replied, like any good car salesman, “Of course!”

So yeah, this isn't happening. Like ever. But thanks for the free, positive press!

Another Last-Gasp Win

Gyasi Zardes' late winner against the Houston Dynamo on Aug. 11 was yet another in a season of miracles. And though that goal might've been eclipsed by Wayne Rooney's rightly hyped hustle and Hail-Mary heave in D.C. United's win over Orlando, we'll take whatever home-field advantage we can get while we have it.