Another reason to go to an Ivy League school? Landing Conan O'Brien as your commencement speaker!

He imparted spot-on graduation wisdom like "Wearing colorful Converse high-tops beneath your graduation robe is a great way to tell your classmates that this is just the first of many horrible decisions that you plan to make for the rest of your life."

Also, he cries less than John Boehner.

You can save approximately $166,944 in tuition and watch the full 24-minute address here: