Part One: Help me get to Houston town

Just touched down into Houston, two and a half bumpy hours on a charter plane about the size of my Corolla. [See my car] It wasn't pretty.

I packed my book like a novice (some would say douche), so I decided to read over the shoulder of the man sitting in front of me. Didn't catch the book title, but the chapter was called "With sex, her 'no' doesn't mean you." There were all sorts of graphs that I couldn't make out.

Half of me felt bad for this man doing such heavy reading on an early-morning flight on a small charter plane from Columbus to Houston. I imagine him sitting home on Sunday afternoon, watching football, forced to view endless Cialis commercials with couples 10 years older sitting in bathtubs on the Mexican coast about to get nasty.

The other half of me wants to lean over, introduce myself and say, "Hey, guess where I'm going tomorrow?"

That would be, as most readers by now know, the 2007 Victoria's Secret Fashion Show taping this week in Los Angeles. Things really start cracking tomorrow, when I'll meet with models and several Ohio girls who won a contest and got to be stand-ins for the rehearsal taking place tomorrow.

Other cool stuff includes: model signings, the actual show, the celebrity-studded PINK carpet and much more. Should be cool. Once I get to LA, look for more photos and less complaints about air travel.

So anyhoo, I said nothing to the man and waited for brunch -- one small cup of Sprite and a muffin the size of a baby's fist.

I understand that pancakes would be difficult to serve on an airplane. Also, they'd be tough to enjoy sitting next to my friendly seat mate -- a Herculean man who could moonlight as a tackle for the New York Giants. I began to direct my ire towards the flight attendant (he didn't like when I called him "steward.")

Then things got bumpy, and I realized this: If we crashed, my last thought would be of some guy required by his employer to wear a short-sleeved shirt with epaulettes.

Currently listening to...

Artist: Elvis Presley Track: "Promised Land" Album: Promised Land Listen