In honor of the latest Sinclair Broadcast Group controversy, we turn to a favored board game
In late March, sports website Deadspin posted a supercut video depicting news anchors at dozens of Sinclair Broadcasting Group stations nationwide reading from the same corporate script, the mass of voices bemoaning a rise in mainstream media “fake news” that has long been a rallying cry for President Donald Trump and those in the right wing.
“Some members of the media use their platforms to push their own bias,” the dead-eyed horde recites in unison. “This is extremely dangerous to democracy.” And you know what? They're right. (They're just wrong about the target, which should be Sinclair.)
In Columbus, WSYX ABC 6 and WTTE FOX 28 are owned by Sinclair, and video of ABC 6 anchors reading from the script surfaced on social media in recent days.
So in honor of the media behemoth and its propaganda-like media push, we thought we'd take a moment to rank our favorite Monopoly tokens.
12. Iron (retired in 2013)
There's not a single chore I'd rank below ironing. If a shirt is wrinkled, I'm more apt to rewash it or throw it away than to take time out to press it.
11. Scottie dog
I'm a dog lover, but the Scottie always seemed intimidatingly high class for my comfort. (Picture Homer wearing a tie to impress a dog on “The Simpsons,” and that's me facing down the Scottie.)
I'm not sure why Monopoly introduced a prehistoric character to the game in 2017, almost 25 years after it might have made at least some commercial sense to do so. (“Jurassic Park” hit theaters in 1993.)
How many Monopoly properties are even located water-side?
8. Cannon (retired in 2000)
If the cannon had managed to hold on until the mass 2017 exodus that forced out the wheelbarrow, boot and iron, it's a virtual certainty the NRA would have campaigned to have it reinstated. *Rolls in 3,000-pound cannon* Oh, this? This is for home protection. And hunting.
7. Horse and rider (retired in 2000)
I liked this token in concept, but its construction almost made the piece feel, I don't know, precarious? It's as though the racecar could blow by and knock it over with its drag. Also, who wants to erect a hitching post on Boardwalk?
6. Rubber ducky
If it's good enough for Bert and Ernie it's good enough for me.
5. Wheelbarrow (retired in 2017)
Perfect for talking trash about the stacks of bills you were gearing up to haul around.
4. Top hat
Even if you spend half the game in jail before going bankrupt, you can still look like a million bucks.
3. Thimble (retired in 2017)
I'm not sure I've ever even seen a thimble outside of the board game, yet if the car and boot were taken, this is the token I gravitated toward.
2. Boot (retired in 2017)
And not just any boot, but the ragged, cartoonish looking kind that musicians/comedians inevitably have thrown at them by agitated audience members in grainy silent films when they're bombing onstage.
A classic, the racecar has been around since Monopoly first hit the market. It's the ideal token, because even if you bust out and build nothing more than a green shanty on St. James, you can still roll in Park Place style.