New bar: Tilted Kilt
Before I'm halfway through my first beer, three girls dressed in mini-skirts and push-up bras have sauntered over to my table, introduced themselves, asked if I needed anything and, when I didn't, assured me they'd check back just in case.
Before I can even order a cheese pizza, the flirty battalion buzzing through the giant barroom nearly has me convinced that I have never smelled better, looked more attractive or sounded so eloquent and charming. The perennially cheery Becca, my table's main point person, sits down several times to chat.
Welcome to Tilted Kilt, a nationwide franchise that combines sports on TV, cut-above pub grub and the power of egregious flirtation to make a man drink up and feel welcome.
Born in 2003 in Las Vegas, Tilted Kilt has now soldiered into more than 45 locations nationwide, including a Polaris branch that opened several weeks ago. It's Ohio's first.
Some might consider Tilted Kilt simply a Celtic version of Hooters, and that's understandable. The outfits stand at center stage and include "knee-high socks and short, sexy plaid kilts with matching plaid bras under white camp shirts tantalizingly tied to show off the midriff," according to the company website.
Kind of like naughty schoolgirls from Glasgow.
However, Tilted Kilt shies from being tacky or unrefined - and has succeeded in fully transforming the former home of the Buffett-themed Cheeseburger in Paradise.
Walls are plastered with peculiar, nostalgic knickknacks - movie posters, bagpipes in shadowboxes, vintage Scotch ads - and proclaim a Celtic pride only hinted at in the red plaid bras. The open floor plan and tall ceilings create a lively, colorful tip-'em-back vibe.
While you're knocking through some pints, you can enjoy a few Old World favorites and plenty of items American pub bubs know and love. Burgers, pizzas and appetizers are available for less than $10, and a diverse set of entrees cashes in slightly higher.
On the alcohol side, Celtic-themed Tilted Kilt is all over the map. Next time you're in the mood for something different - like using lager as a mixer - try one of these concoctions.
Raspberry Shandy: Light beer, Grand Marnier and Monin raspberry puree
3 Amigos: Light beer, Grand Marnier, 1800 Silver, fresh sour and Sprite
8665 Sancus Blvd., Polaris
Hours: 11 a.m.-1 a.m. Sunday-Wednesday, 11 a.m.-2 a.m. Thursday-Saturday
Happy hour: 3-6 p.m. weekdays: Draft beer specials
Sam Adams seasonal
Sam Adams Boston Lager