Daily Distraction: The Killer Croissant of Krakow, Poland

The transcript of a recent call to the Krakow Animal Welfare Society has to be seen to be believed

Andy Downing
Columbus Alive
A plate of croissants

Recently, there have been a number of cases of potentially mistaken identity within Ohio.

In Cincinnati, police were called in following reports of a gang of monkeys on the loose in a cemetery, though it was eventually determined that what callers had likely spotted were actually wild turkeys. Then there's the elusive Big Squirrel, so named because it is a big squirrel, which was supposedly spotted at least once in Clintonville but has since displayed a yeti-like knack for staying out of eyesight. 

But both of these, however, pale to a recent case in Krakow, Poland, where a woman phoned the police to alert them to "an unidentified animal" that had been sitting in her bushes for two days straight.

"People aren't opening their windows because they're afraid it will go into their house," the woman reportedly said in a call with the Krakow Animal Welfare Society, which posted a transcript of the call on Facebook, as well as the details of its visit to retrieve the animal.

"The brown creature is sitting on a lilac branch," reads the post. "His brown skin will shine in the sun, although there is some sort of collapse anywhere. We are looking more closely - poor guy has no legs or head."

This is because the caller had actually alerted authorities to the presence of a croissant that had been wedged in the tree, leading to an all-time great BBC headline: Mystery tree beast turns out to be croissant.

Think of that and try to resist the urge to call for help the next time you're eyeing the pastries behind the glass at Fox in the Snow.