The List: Ranking the appropriate means of travel left in the Short North

With e-scooters banned from that stretch of High Street, we look at some alternate modes of transport

Andy Downing
Columbus Alive
A man zips down High Street through the Short North on a Bird Scooter in 2018.

E-scooters are now banned from a stretch of High Street running through the Short North. The restrictions, designed to curb an increase in violent crime in the area, went into effect at 5 p.m. on Monday, with scooters now prohibited along High Street from Goodale Street to Fifth Avenue.

“Columbus Police have raised concerns about misuse of scooters in this area,” Kelly Scocco, deputy director of the Department of Public Service, wrote in a memo announcing the ban.

The loss of e-scooters is only the most recent travel hiccup to hit the Short North, following word that COTA’s free and popular CBus circulator, which previously ran from the Short North to the Brewery District, would not be returning. The neighborhood also led the charge for the rest of the city in swapping out traditional parking meters for an app-driven system, which is both more expensive and requires a smartphone and/or a bank card — all potential hurdles for lower-income visitors to the area.

Fortunately, there are still other ways for the city's swankiest residents to traverse this trend-setting stretch of High Street. Here are just a few ranked from least to most acceptable.

Driving

The city would benefit from deprioritizing the car, in general, so why not start with this dense, highly traveled neighborhood?

Buses

Columbus does some things well but public transportation is not one of them.

Walking

And because of that, here I am using my legs like a sucker.

Bicycling

OK, so High Street isn’t exactly designed for bikes, particularly on the congested stretch we’re focused on here. But it still might be easier to snag a bike rack on the weekend than a parking spot.

Uber, Lyft, etc.

Beats circling for parking, even if it doesn’t do much for traffic.

Pedicab

Like biking but with an assist from the gig economy.

Uber Black

Do you really want to roll up to the new Chris Corso or Cameron Mitchell venture in a basic Uber?

Horse-driven carriage

Now we’re getting somewhere.

Carried aloft on a plush, velvet daybed by a shirtless coterie

If it was good enough for Billy Porter at the 2019 Met Gala then it’s good enough for you at 2021 Marcella’s.

Pedal wagons

If the Short North was a vehicle, it would be a pedal pub. As a result, we can’t imagine the Department of Public Service ever banning these slow-rolling bar crawlers from the neighborhood. I mean, “pub” is right there in the department's name.